Comedian Turns to TikTok to Help Lure in True Love
(Sadie Quagliotto, Feb. 11, 2021)
Dating has always been difficult. The art of meeting someone, connecting, and turning that connection into something special that can last has been analyzed from every angle. You can buy a book that tells you how to date, follow gurus that will tell you how to find the perfect partner, or sign up for dating services that promise to deliver the love of your life right to your inbox. But, no matter which angle you choose to approach dating, there is no guarantee that you will end up having a happily ever after so how do you know how to start looking for “the one”?
According to the Pew Research Center, nearly half of U.S. adults say dating has gotten harder for most people in the last 10 years”. Among those who are on the dating market – the 15% of American adults who are single and looking for a committed relationship or casual dates – most say they are dissatisfied with their dating lives and that it has been difficult to find people to date. While single-and-looking men and women report equal levels of dissatisfaction with their dating lives and the ease of finding people to date, women are more likely to say they have had some particularly negative experiences especially when it comes to online dating, where women are more likely to be harassed.
These days, roughly one-in-ten partnered adults met their partners online, but this is far more common among some groups including LGBTQ+. And, despite easy access to apps like Bumble and Tinder introductions through family or friends are still the most common way people meet a partner. About a third (32%) of adults who are married, living with a partner, or in a committed relationship say that is how they first met their current partner, while 18% say they met through work, 17% through school, 12% online, 8% at a bar or restaurant, 5% at a place of worship and 8% somewhere else.
On top of all of this we are in the middle of a worldwide pandemic where we are all encouraged to stay away from anyone that we do not already live with which is making dating even harder. All of these stats can seem overwhelming and discouraging so I reached out to a local comedian, yoga instructor and life coach named Hailey Zureich to talk to her about the interesting approach that she has taken to dating during a pandemic.
Hailey is in her mid 30’s, she owns her own home, has a steady job and has a loyal following on tiktok that enjoys her humor and wit. She is actively searching for a long term partner and has hit a lot of roadblocks along the way. Prior to COVID she was using dating apps and meeting people in person. She said she would talk to people at comedy clubs and during nights out with her friends, she even met people at the grocery store.
Before COVID she had gotten to the point that she was so encouraged by her ability to meet people in person and so discouraged by repeating the same chain of events with people on dating apps that she has taken herself off apps. But, after months of lockdown and a few failed pre-pandemic romances that didn’t play out the way she wanted, she found herself dating in a new world where meeting up was unrealistic until the summer.
So, after a few months, she got back on the apps and decided to use her influencer status on toktok to take a different approach to dating. She created a new hashtag #datezhailey and started making videos that explained why you, or someone great that you know should reach out and take her out on a date. She explained that this was a fun way for her to put herself out there, and to let her circle of friends (personal and virtual) know that she is looking. She also started using her platform to go live to talk to her followers about her dating journey. Last Friday, she even logged on right before a video chat with a potential suitor to share her excitement about the date with her followers.
So, has this led to her finding a long term partner? Not yet, but her videos have been viewed almost 200,000 times and she has had some really great dates during a time when it’s harder than ever to meet someone and make something happen.
So, what’s her advice? She recommends that you go someplace physically or virtually to meet someone. Are you into comic books? Find an online group and start chatting with everyone in there. You already know that you have one thing in common, maybe you have more! I asked her how you would figure out what kind of groups that you should be looking for and she recommended that you think of the person that you want to be with, and ask yourself what are they doing? What are your mutual interests? Go to those places to meet those people.
I also asked her what is the best etiquette for meeting someone in a post COVID world? She recommended that if you meet someone online you initially start chatting through the app (do not exchange numbers), if that goes well, set up a phone call and chat for a bit on the phone and if there is still a connection set up a video call. From there you can set up a meeting in a public place and if and when it feels right you can take it further from there. She also recommended that you talk about COVID precautions and expectations before you meet up and warned that this strategy will lead to less in person meetings but better in person meetings if you can get there.
So, if it feels like it’s harder than ever to meet people, it’s because it is. Somehow with a million apps and options at our fingertips it has become even more of a challenge to connect. But, it has also made the options to connect endless. Which means the best way to meet someone, is to put yourself out there and start trying to meet someone.
If you would like to follow Hailey on her dating journey, keep up with her tiktok here.
And if you want to #datezhailey, send her a DM and see where it goes.
Sadie Quagliotto is a blogger, writer and social media marketing master. She is passionate about food, music, shopping local, Metro Detroit and Lady Gaga. You can follow her journey around Metro Detroit @ hipindetroit.com and learn more about her social media services at sadiequagliotto.com, you can also follow her on IG @ sadiehipindetroit.