Divorce and Families pt 4 of 4: How Do Teens React to Divorce?
(Guest Series Part 1 of 4, Lisa Schmidt, Schmidt Law Services, March 31, 2015)
How Do Teens React to Divorce?
Teens are notoriously temperamental, especially when there is conflict in the family. This last in a four part series will help you and your teenager weather the storm of divorce.
Adolescence is a period of mood swings and fights for independence, even when there isn’t conflict within the home. The added stress of a divorce can push high school children into dangerous activities and emotional challenges.
Independence or Isolation
Teens naturally distance themselves from parents and sibling, valuing friends and school more than family. But when parents separate it can make teenagers feel betrayed. The normal shift from idealizing parents to seeing their flaws can be exaggerated, and teens can become bitter and demeaning.
Financial Fears
Teens start to be able to understand the financial concerns of their parents. As they watch one home become two they may be afraid for the their future prospects, including how to pay for college.
Emotional Risks
In their teenage years, many children experience increased emotional turmoil. When high conflict divorce is added to the mix, it can lead to feelings of intense anger, betrayal, and depression. Parents need to be particularly diligent against changes in school accomplishments, appetite, or sleeping habits. These external symptoms can be hints at depression and feelings of worthlessness, and even suicidal or self-injurious thoughts (like cutting).
Risky Behaviors
Teenagers express their feelings verbally and through risky behaviors, including drug and alcohol use, sexual activity, and aggressive behavior. This can cause problems at school and with the juvenile courts. Some of these activities are part of normal high school exploration. But parents need to be aware of the fine lines between normal behavior and distress.
Parents with teens need to be ready to work to help teenagers get through the divorce process. Even though teens may express wanting to be left alone, they need support from both parents. They may need help understanding why parents have made the choices they did, and that their mom and dad still care and want to be involved in their lives.
Lisa J. Schmidt at Schmidt Law Services is particularly well suited to help you and your teen make it through your divorce unscathed. Her work with teens in school disciplinary actions and juvenile defense means she understands what your teen is going through and can help you help them make the transition. To get Lisa’s help with your divorce, contact Schmidt Law Services today for a consultation
Lisa J. Schmidt is a family lawyer for Schmidt Law Services, PLLC in Ferndale, Michigan. She emphasizes client engagement and gives each case her individualized attention. If you would like a free initial consultation, contact Schmidt Law Services today. This blog is reprinted with permission from http://schmidtlawservices.com/2014/12/15/how-do-teens-react-to-divorce/